HORSES.

Something interesting is going on with meat in Europe.

Horse. In everything. You cannot even have a normal kebap without having to wonder whether you're chewing on horse meat or not.

Saw a documentary this Wednesday where they showed how they transport horses to the butcher. What you have to consider though: it's not only horses. They treat all the animals like this.

One example:
Eggs. I love eggs.
But have you ever considered what happens to most baby cocks? Chicken - well keep them. They produce eggs, we can sell them.
But baby cocks - most of them end up in a box, they sort of "collect" them, when they're still alive, then next box on top to fill with more baby cocks - don't worry about the ones in the box under this one! - and they end up in a ... shredder if you want to call it that way - and you know those protein shakes and pulver and whatever that so many people use to build up their muscles?
Tadaa. Disgusting, 

I sat there, crying. I knew all of this before. I used to be a vegetarian for so  many years. Then I started eating meat again - bulimia, thank you very much.
I have not eaten meat since Wednesday - it's not like I said: "Oh, I'm watching a documentary where they show how they treat animals before they slaughter them, maybe I should stop eating meat for a while because I'm shedding a tear and it would be hypocritical to have my ham sandwich in the morning" - Nope. I'm not like that.

I just haven't eaten meat since then. When I was a veggie, it was mainly because I couldn't eat meat without seeing an animal staring at me - but those days are over and the only reason is the eating disorder so I know that I will end up eating meat again. But I rather enjoy being able to resist again and I hope it will last for a while.

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I spent a lot of money on housing lately - amazing how expensive everything is. And I really need a holiday, I should be saving money for this.

Australia - cannot afford to go there but I think it would be the best vacation spot for me.
Another idea are short trips.

Paris, London - cannot decide. I miss London, like hell! London is my home, I miss it, I want to go back!

Was in Paris once - for a weekend, on my own. It was rainy and I am pretty sure that Paris can be a wonderful and beautiful city - when it's sunny. I consider Paris very dependent on the weather.

Both places would be nice. I know where to find vintage shops and everything inspiring in LDN but Paris would be something new. But the weather ... hm.

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working out has been kind of fun lately. But so far it's not done one thing to my body. I still have an enormous ass and everything's wobbly. My gym has a huge wellness and spa area but I haven't really used it because most people there are confident enough to not even wear a towel - I cannot even change in front of other people.

Well. I'm off to the gym now, actually.

Sorry for my bad english today, I'm really tired :( And cannot concentrate.
God I have to move back to England. I'm actually "unlearning" all my English skills. Hate it.